How many are looking for a new beginning?

Friday, May 1, 2009

A New Beginning - Round Fifteen

Its been almost a year since that London trip. It was memorable in many ways but at the same time it was a trip that she wished to delete from her memory. Jooja stayed for two nights only before being called for an emergency meeting in San Francisco. She didnt want her to go because she actually made things better being the so-called third wheel.

But she had to tell him. She thought it best to tell him in London so that he can have his time to decide whether he wanted to make better use of the remaining one week. He shocked her with his reaction. She could easily describe him as cold and heartless. He said "if thats what you want but we could remain as friends".

Was she too selfish to WANT a big scene? Was she too self absorbed to have thought that he would fight for her and try to convince her that things will work out?? Especialy with someone who went through the effort of flying her best friend to keep her company as well as dropping eveyrthing he has back home to spend two weeks in London waiting for her to finish her training every day late evening.

Why was he so cold???

She was not the kind of person that can remain friends with an ex. She explained that to him and he seemed to understand. He completely withdrew from her life. This crushed her even more.

And now a year later, she knows that he is still single. He occasionally sends her some messages wishing her a hapy birthday, a happy eid, etc.

She sat there staring at herself in the mirror. One eye heavily lined with black kohl, the way she always wears her eye makeup. The other still bare and untouched. She felt like a robot going about her daily routine without much thought. Except it was different. She was getting ready for a blind date. Jooja was sitting on the bed yabbering away in french with her boss who chose the worst possible time to call and ask about her progress.

Why is it that everyone around her refused to see what was going on with her?? Or was she just that good of a actress to give the impression that everything was fine. She tried not to think about him but it was hard. They were not together that long but their relationship was very genuine and strong.

She finished up just as Jooja got off the phone. Jooja did her usual catcall and whistle whenever she saw her wearing a dress. She was not the kind to wear a dress at all. They walked out of the hotel room and into the lift. They primped and pruned themselves in the full mirror until they reached the lobby. The doors opened and just as she was about to step out, something white caught her attention and she looked. The next few steps were completely robotic and guided by Jooja. She couldnt carry on. She just froze and stared. This cannot be happening.